I came into recovery with all the
tolerance and patience as a world best
   I was numb all over.
   My brain had turned to mush.
   I didn't give a hoot if you pulled a
loaded shotgun on me and blew my head
   I began recovery with 2.9 strikes
against me.
   So, you may ask what happened?
   To be truthful, I began to witness life
in a way I thought was only possible in a
dream.  Slowly I became to understand
and accept that I had a disease that was
about to kill me.  Then I had second
thoughts about dying.
   Yes, I wanted to live.
   So I fell in love with the one thing that
was possible for the miracle to happen.
Alcoholics Anonymous!
   I began to listen, read, and absorbed all
that was suggested to me and began to
enjoy a sober life with the tolerance and
patience of a miracle on feet.   9/17/03
  In all my years as an active alcoholic, I insisted on
making mountains out of mole hills.  No matter what
transpired during each drinking day, I reacted in a
pessimistic attitude.
  I cared less of situations happening around the
globe.  If it was no benefit to my disease to keep me
active, I wanted no part of it.
  I hurt many people and myself along this path of
drunken days.  I couldn't even succeed in suicide
when three sheets to the wind.
  That is being drunk in a blackout.
  You see, I had no emotions within thyself.  I was
always looking to ways to be active with my disease
of drinking.  It was the only priority I had to living
in the now.
  So, you may ask what happened?
  I was to learn early in my sobriety by what was
taught by the hands of
Alcoholics Anonymous; that of
  It is amazing how much emotions were instilled
within thyself.  And, as for over reacting?  I know
that with the optimism I've grown with, I need not
make any mountains out of mole hills.    9/18/03
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"A Bad Neighborhood?"
   I love what this alcoholic heard at a
meeting recently.  
"My mind is like a bad
neighborhood, I dare not go there alone."
How do we prevent the stinking
thinking from invading our minds?
    It does not matter how many days of
sobriety that I have; I just know that to
remain sober, I must continue to work the
program that I have been taught.
    This entails that I do my daily readings
each morning upon awakening.   That
throughout each day I keep a focus on my
Higher Power and recite the
when necessary.  That I keep in
contact with the fellowship of f2f meetings,
not to have a second thought of using the
telephone, if need too.
    By having worked the suggested steps
of AA, (that took months and months to
do; and still, today do updates of all steps in
keeping a fresh perspective of my
recovery), I believe that each new day is
simply that.
    This all prevents the stinking thinking
from even entering my bad neighborhood
and sticking like glue.     10/12/03
"Honest the Truth"
   I work the program of Alcoholics Anonymous.  
In chapter five of the Big Book, entitled
"How it
not once does it mention about
sponsorship.  It does speak out about one
important ingredient for sobriety.
    That is honesty.
    I have never to date had myself a sponsor.  I
fell in love with meetings and the fellowship.  It
was true at first, that I believed only in these
meetings to keep me sober.  It took time to grasp
the under-standing of a Higher Power.  But the
more I became optimistic with my life sober, the
more I became to believe in a God of my
    I have witnessed many of the fellowship go back
out and then return.  Some with many
days/months/years of sobriety.  And some not to
    I believe the reasoning more than anything was
the concept of not being honest with thyself.
    Whenever a newcomer asks me to be sponsor, I
only speak out about this.
    To be honest, read the Big Book, and go to
    It works if you work it and be honest.
   My name is Cliff an alcoholic.  Let me just say, that I am not Bingocliff because I love the
game Bingo.  I don't play.
    The hardest thing for this alcoholic to ever have done was to quit drinking.  Having picked up
the character defects along the way made it that much harder.  But the fact is that I finally put
the cork back into the bottle.
    What AA and the twelve steps have done for this alkie, was to remain sober up through to
today.  It also gradually dispersed of character defects that were the ruin of this person.  It took
time to work each step through.  When finally reaching step twelve, I could see a beautiful
change that had occurred with this alcoholic person.
    Today I continue to work the suggested steps of AA to remain sober.  It works each day one
day at a time.  I am a miracle, and once that miracle happened, I yelled BINGO!    12/17/03
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